Divorce has become a common practice in our society. 40 to 50 percent of all marriages end in divorce. People believe that when things get rough in the marriage, it is disposal. The family unit stability is under attack. The family is breaking down especially in low-income middle American. In most states, they have no-fault divorce. It makes it easy for the husband and wife to get out of a marriage without blaming each other.
I personal come from a line of broken families. My grandparent’s divorce and so did my parents. I carried the line on when I divorced. My family doesn’t come from a religious background. Growing up I saw divorce as a way out of a bad marriage. There was no counseling. There was never any reaching out for help to save the marriage. When the marriage got hard or rough, they would just leave it all behind. As a child from divorced parents and grandparents, I thought it was natural to do.
The divorce takes a toll on the children involved. They blame themselves for the divorce. The divorce causes emotional, behavioral and cognitive problems well into adulthood. There has been in depth research on the effects that divorce has on children. In “The State of Our Unions Marriage in America 2012” it goes into great detail on the impact that divorce has on children and as they emerge into adulthood.
I can personally say that my parent’s divorce took a toll on me. It was a very nasty divorce. I grew up with my Father and stepmother. I was estranged from my mother. Even as an adult I don’t have a good relationship with my parent’s. I have seen the same impact on my children. Except they are estranged from their father.
I have been able to learn a different way since becoming a member of the Church. I have learned that most marriages are savable. That Heavenly Father wants us stay within our unions and work towards Him. I loved how Elder Oak’s talked about Divorce. He said “Bishops do not counsel members to divorce, but they can help members with the consequences of their decisions. Under the law of the Lord, a marriage, like a human life, is a precious, living thing. If our bodies are sick, we seek to heal them. We do not give up. While there is any prospect of life, we seek healing again and again. The same should be true of our marriages, and if we seek Him, the Lord will help us and heal us.”
I have been able to see that marriage is something worth saving. It is as Elder Oak’s states “a precious, living thing.” Our Creator wants to heal our sick marriages, he doesn’t want to see us end this precious, living thing. Elder Oaks also says “A good marriage does not require a perfect man or a perfect woman. It only requires a man and a woman committed to strive together toward perfection.” No one is perfect on this earth. We are all striving towards perfection, but we must choose to stay committed to each other.
Marriage 